lior asks me will the battles ever cease? and i just can't answer. i know they will one day, but in the meantime it feels like they won't. my loneliness is real, he says. so's mine kiddo.

what are the chances of two innately sinful people ever getting married? it doesn't make sense in the scheme of this world we've stolen from god.
when people say miracles are dead...
when people speak of 'godincidences'...
i immediately picture marriage and coupledom or whatever it is that is allegedly the holy grail. or something. i mean, the chances that
a.) girl likes boy (and that includes physically, emotionally, spiritually, everythingelselly)
b.) boy likes girl (ditto)
c.) they are compatible in maturity, as people and as christians
d.) they can put up with each others' faults
e.) they can forsee putting up with each others' faults for the rest of their lives, once the euphoria wears off
f.) they meet in the first place
and so on.

don't tell me the odds aren't stacked against you.

don't tell me it's not god with his finger on your shoulder, pushing you towards where you need to be

don't tell me it's not amazing and scary

sitting with a stranger

just about to lose my mind

when you decide the time's not right

and leave me way behind

sitting with a stranger

trying to keep it together

swimming around you holding my breath

waiting for a change in the weather